A new beginning - again

Hey look ma... I'm blogging... I think :)  Well... we'll see how this goes.  Seems like a good way to narrate my food trip.  I'm pretty sure I will only ever have one reader... me.  That's ok... I just need a place to think out loud.

So... here's a bit about me.  I consider myself to be "pretty normal".  But... what do I know... what's normal?   There are a few extraordinary things in my life - like my family and my home.  I have a wonderful husband who loves me.  I have no idea why!  Sometimes I am grumpy :)  but... usually not.  We raised 6 children.  They range from 19 to 28 years old and they are in various stages of turning out great.  I have an awesome extended family.  Grew up in the south - a whole lot of family still there.  I identify very strongly with my southern roots and all the food associated with it.  Fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy.  Soft fluffy rolls - oh - cornbread!  BBQ pork.  So many great cooks - so many diabetics!  I grew up pretty lean.  I was a dancer and an eater.  I had three brothers so had to compete for that second pile of mashed potatoes.  I learned very early how to pack it away and I could eat anything and as much of it as I wanted.  Yum!  Then I turned 40.  Things began to change.  My clothes begin to shrink - and shrink - and shrink :(   I really hate it when that happens.

My parents both developed type 2 diabetes as they began aging but I never imagined it might happen to me!  My dad used to come to visit and always wanted me to test my blood sugar level.  I never wanted to.  Finally I did and surprise!  I decided I better go to the doc and see what was up.  So at 48 I discovered that I was pre-diabetic and began learning a bit about that and experimenting with diet and nutrition.  I learned that if I am disciplined I can still control the diabetes with diet alone.  I discovered that with a little creativity and determination I could control my blood sugar, drop weight, have energy and feel very good about my self.  And I learned that I could as quickly blow it all and end up pudgy and feeling toxic and having the doc frown over my lab results.   So... that's where I am now.  I have a choice to make.  I can either be healthy which means developing a permanent lifestyle of moderation and good choices or give up and just become a slave to my chocolate/pasta/cookie addiction.  I think I'm going to take the challenge and "just do it".  At my last appointment my doc decided that it was time to begin taking medication for the diabetes.  I begged for just one more last chance.  So she has given me three months to show a significant improvement in my lab results. If I am unable to do that and maintain it then yes, bring on the medication - but first let's see what I can do.

Like I mentioned... I do love to cook and very fortunately I like veggies.  I know what foods trigger the blood sugar spikes.  I have a basic understanding of the glycemic index and what foods I can enjoy and which are real problems for me.  It's not that I can't or don't like healthy foods, I do!  But just one french fry leads to a whole plate of them!  Moderation is really not my strength... which is why I am in the shape I am today :(

Well... there usually is an event that triggers a lifestyle change right?  For me it was this nasty bug that caused me to eat very little for close to a week.  Once I saw I had dropped about 5 pounds I figured now was as good a time as any to start.  Of course I have been thinking a lot about my health and was working up to getting with the plan but just had not quite done it yet.  I'm not quite at my all time fattest but close.  I'm hovering between my fat and not so fat pants.  One size looks sort of baggy and the other is just not comfy.  My fasting blood sugar level in the morning has been about 155.  Not horrible but definitely out of the normal range.  To make it really simple I have learned that when I am eating right I can have a fasting or morning blood sugar level consistently right around 100 and that makes for very good lab reports so that is my goal.  I hear all the time that you shouldn't weigh yourself every day but I do.  Well... I do when I'm focusing on eating properly.  When I'm not I don't get on the scales because - well... I know what I'm going to see... I despise the numbers I am seeing on the scales right now but I'm going to throw it out there because that along with my blood sugar level is how I start my day.  So like I said... about a week ago I had the 155 blood sugar and was weighing in at right around 170 lbs.  Ugg!  This morning I was at 166.4 and blood sugar of 129.  That's an improvement.  I want to keep moving in the right direction.  Yesterday the new cookbook I ordered arrived and I'm very excited about it.  It's Cooking Light's new Fresh Food Fast Weeknight Meals.  Has some great recipes.  I am a cookbook and food network junkie.  I don't usually go strictly by any recipe I just get ideas and go from there.  I'm not sure why I keep buying more cookbooks - I have a zillion - but I just love them.

Ok - I am sleepy and my fingers are tired so I'm outta here!  I actually feel pretty good about my food today.  I made a killer steak salad for lunch and although I made burgers for dinner - really should have avoided the bread - the beef is very lean (grew it myself) and piled high with yummy stuff like tomatoes, red leaf lettuce, caramelized onion, fire roasted red peppers, a little goat cheese.  I had so many veggies piled high that I didn't feel the need for a side dish of any kind.  I'm sure the bun will result in a bit higher glucose in the morning but over all for the day not bad.  Perhaps a few too many cashews though :)

All right... now I'm really outta here!  Ciao!

Kathy O